Friday, January 13, 2006

Bad-Girl Envy

Confession time. I've always envied "bad" girls. The hair. The eye-liner. The boots. Did I mention the eye-liner? But mostly, I envy the attitude. Make that ATTITUDE. There's something mysterious and bold and up-yours about 'em that I've never been able to pull off. All my middle class, nice-girl raisin' is no match for these chicks (even though many of them had middle class, nice-girl raisings themselves).

Now, there's a big difference between bad girls and mean or slutty girls. Bad girls have heart and style; mean girls are heartless, conniving bitches. And slutty girls are just, well, slutty. Modern-equivalent bad girls: Christina Ricci, Fairuza Balk, Winona Ryder, etc. You know who the mean/slutty girls are.

In junior high and high school, bad girls were the ones smoking in the bathroom between classes, teasing hair to the heavens and lacquering it down with AquaNet or Adorn (or carefully parting long, straight hair down the middle just so), and - of course - applying another layer of black eye-liner and white lipstick. I never envied the smoking part, but the style and attitude was strangely appealing. A true bad girl always exuded an aura of someone with a great tragedy deep within that had to be covered over with heavy make-up and dark clothing. I don't know how much of that was true and how much was play-acting, but more often than not they were pretty nice to me because I wasn't afraid of them. Once in a while the anger-facade cracked and a conversation broke through.

I'm still kind of a good girl, but my plan is to become a bad girl in my 70s and 80s. The hair's only gonna get higher and redder with age, and I see an opportunity to slather on make-up with a trowel as the face starts to cave. Leather pants and boots? I'm there, baby. And just as I reach my bad-girl zenith at say - 87 or so, I'll ride off into the sunset with the Leader of the Pack and explode into stardust. And I bet God'll welcome me with two big thumbs up and a "Way to go, chick!"

I think it's a good plan.


petercmoore said...

I don't know about 'bad', but Christina Ricci is definitely HOT.

[I hope she's now old enough to be called "hot" by a man of my age!]

I'd also include Eliza Dushku in that list. Mainly 'cos she's hot too. But also because I haven't the faintest idea who Fairuza Balk is. Even after Googling her.

I think growing old allows all women to become 'bad'. The number of times I've held a door open for a sweet-looking 80-year old lady; but they never say "thanks", they just glare at you like you spat on them.

MaryB said...

Yeh, yeh - Eliza Dushku falls on the bad girl list. Fairuza Balk played Dorothy in Return to Oz (awesome 1980s film, BTW) but moved on to a lot of Goth-girl roles as she got older. She and Ricci are in a couple of films together.

And no, see, those old bats who get angry with you if you open a door are "mean" girls, not "bad" girls. A bad-girl old lady, would say thanks with a toss of her teased up red hair and smack you on the butt as you walked by. And ask if you needed a ride home on her Harley. It's all in the attitude, my friend.

Chris said...

I'm now halfway through my sixties (or is it sixty's - can't make up my mind) and I'm with you all the way. I can't stand that poem about wearing purple and a red hat because I don't want to be eccentric, I want to emulate women like Joan Collins and Goldie Hawn. I'm not sure that it's working 100% 'cos I can't afford their nips and tucks but, by God, I'm going down fighting!!

PS How did you know my hair was red?

MaryB said...

Lucky guess on my part, Chris!

Forget the nips and tucks. We'll find other ways to release our inner bad-assness! Now, get out that teasing comb and hairspray!