OK, folks - I've had it. Everyone seems to be singing the praises of the Newsweek cover story about Baby Boomers. Haven't read it yet - have read some excerpts - but people are bloggin' all over the place about it, and boy, do I have some bones to pick.
Where the hell are they diggin' up all these supposed B2's who want to stay young forever and have plastic surgery until they resemble something created by a Vac-U-Form? I know no one - NO one - in my age group who has plopped down one red cent for Botox, tummy tucks, liposuction.
Yeah, I'm sure they're out there and that you have the stats to prove it, but all the fine ladies I know with stretched out faces are members of the noble "Silent Generation" (the ones wedged between the GG's and the BB's) OR are rock/film stars. And most of the publicity I've seen on boob and nose jobs concerns women in their teens and twenties.
We have no more fear of getting old or losing our independence and good looks than any other generation. Don't make me pull out a list, people! Granted, we have more access to plastic surgery than the film stars of old; I assume that will increase as time goes on. (Oh, you lucky GenXr's!) So sue us!
Is it wrong to exercise, eat right, take care of our teeth - just, well, because that's what we were brought up to do? Is that "wanting to say young forever," or just wanting to be as healthy as we can be going into our silver (there, I said it: SILVER) years.? We were a part of JFK's "Vigor" campaign and Crest's "Look Ma, no cavities!" Why don't we, as a generation, just sit down, let our hair go yellow-white and our teeth rot? Seems if we do otherwise, we're deemed "self-involved."
Forgive us for being born (speak to the GG's about humpin' like rabbits after WWII, why don'cha?).
Forgive us for believing that life doesn't end at 60.
Forgive us for wanting to stay healthy and look as good as we can for as long as we can.
Forgive us for wanting to find out the why's and wherefores of things - how relationships work, what we believe, where we fit.
Forgive us for being the guinea pigs for advertising and entertainment powers for 60 years. Sorry that our "dreadful" music is still kickin' ass (though to be fair, rock-and-roll was foisted on the masses by the Silent Gens, not us - we just kept it going). Forgive us for Etch-a-Sketches, The Flintstones, mini-skirts, blue jeans, disco, Cabbage Patch dolls, minivans, and computers. Not that we invented any of these - we just kept them economically viable.
Forgive us for having the opportunity to get a college education and then working hard and volunteering even harder.
Forgive us for living long enough to become a burden on the healthcare system. Ya' shoulda killed more of us in Vietnam or at Kent State, I reckon.
Forgive us for loving both our parents and our children enough (to the 10th power) to be caught in the middle - and yet finding the love, patience, and money to handle everything without collapsing under the weight of it all.
Right place. Right time. What can I say? We were - and are - lucky, lucky, lucky, but I don't know anyone in my age group who doesn't know this and thank God everyday for it. Even on the days when our knees don't work so well.
So I don't understand who these B2s are that the media and whippersnapper advertising young 'uns and folks over 60 keep complaining about. You're all being sold a bill o' goods.
Why, I'm looking forward to my batty old geezer-lady days: Madras Depends (cuz it'll be so cool when they "bleed" - we'll pee on purpose!), personal scooter vehicles that'll top 50 mph, mass "hip-ins" replacement surgeries as a result of the Thursday evening Twist Parties.
But, hon, my hair's only gonna get higher and redder as the years go by. How else will this self-involved B2 stand out in a crowd without it?