Monday, October 22, 2007

The smelly guy on the train

Ah, the joys of a subway commute in New York! I've gotten used to iPods blaring from the little ear-buds of multiple users and folks who like to take up a seat-and-a-half and the big dudes (or short women with baby strollers) who block the subways doors. But today I hit another wall.

At 96th Street a guy got on the ever-crowding subway car and stood right in front of me. He had evidently taken a bath in cheap cologne. Mmmmm! Several of us started coughing and I swear my eyes started watering. I mean this guy reaked. I found myself taking short, shallow breaths (and almost hyperventilated) to avoid the stench.

What is it with folks and their perfume and cologne? A teeny-tiny bit goes such a long way. As for me, give me the smell of good ol' soap and water any day.

And when Pepe le Pew got off the train, we all breathed a sigh of relief. Except that the scent still lingered.

7 comments:

Elsie said...

Funny...yesterday after reading this post I ran across a woman at the store, and both kids wrinkled their noses. All I could think of was you and that we should introduce Pepe to Pepette le Pew. Thankfully, I don't run into this situation very often. Better the cologne stench than BO? Then again, maybe not.

I thought we are supposed to wear perfume/cologne so that only those invited into our personal space get to know how lovely we smell. I'm with you on the soap and water thing, and a nice shampoo scent doesn't hurt either.

It's been a long time since my subway riding days, and I don't miss them a bit. God bless you, Mary!

Liz said...

I do like my perfume but I hope it's not too strong! A lot of men's colognes seem overpowering. Perhaps that's the idea: that women are overcome and fall into their arms!

Anonymous said...

I remember Billy mentioning that he had a room-mate at Carson Newman who, rather than wash his socks, simply sprayed them with Right Guard. And, if that's correct cuz, then the moose head lives!!
We celebrated Kittie's birthday (10/21) visiting the California wine country. Those wine people have way too much time on their hands. It all tastes pretty much the same to me.

Winston said...

Recently I had a long (25-floors with several stops) elevator ride with a, shall we say, ample matron who had doused herself with cheap perfume. When we finally stumbled off at ground level, gasping for air, I had somewhere around 7 seconds of oxygen left in my brain and bloodstream before passing out.

Maybe we should be glad these people do it. God knows what it is they're covering up...

Winston said...

btw, urban dictionary says that "reaked" has not been defined yet...

MaryB said...

Winston - OK: "wreaked," then. Except it's not the same, though the guy did "wreak" havoc on our olfactory glands. No. He flat-out "reaked." And these folks are obviously covering up the smell of . . . death.

Cuz - Happy Birthday to Miss Kittie. And I'm glad to know you can't tell the diff between the wines. I'll bring the cheap stuff to the Christmas party. ;-)

Elsie - I didn't get the idea that the guy had BO - wouldn't it kinda mingle into the cologne scent? Fortunately - and it's hard to believe, I know - most people on the crowded subways here smell fine. That's why the perfume-guy stood out.

Liz - good theory, except I think the women were trying to run as far from this guy as possible!

Chris said...

Many, many years ago, in my first job as a telephonist in a very large telephone exchange, a woman used to arrive on the early morning shift reeking of a perfume called Tabu. This was very, very strong and dab behind the ear would have sufficed but this lady, I think, used a whole bottle in her bath water. Mixed with the smog that used to creep into the very old building in those days (so dense that sometimes you couldn't see across the room) it's a wonder that we didn't all die of some awful lung disease.