Lesson 1
Song of Alvin 1:3 - And there were in those days Hula Hoop-craving, Loop-the-Loop Plane-desiring chipmunks who try to alter their usual bratty, destructive behavior in anticipation of the gift-giving season. ~ The Chipmunk Song
Lesson 2
Impossibilities 4:9 - And, lo, a child demands a large, mostly herbivorous, semiaquatic mammal and ungulate native to sub-Saharan Africa for Christmas instead of dolls or Tinkertoys. ~ "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas
Lesson 3
Second
Incisor 8:15 - In want of missing teeth, a young child eschews the usual list of goodies for the ability to say "Sister Susie sitting on a thistle." ~ All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth
Repercussions 31:45 - Bewailing the possibility of an empty stocking, one frog-in-bed-hiding, ink-spilling, bug-eating-forcer tries to lay blame for his bad behavior on a tattletale. ~ I'm Gettin' Nuttin' for Christmas
Lesson 5:
First Warnings 6:5 - Behold, Santa is making a list, checking it twice, and - like your cell phone and Alexa - spying on every little thing you do. So be good for goodness' sake. Until Christmas. ~ Santa Claus is Coming to Town
Lesson 6
Improprieties 17:12 - Childhood trauma ensues when mommy is caught tickling and kissing the gift-bearing North Pole resident underneath the mistletoe. Or maybe it was all a big misunderstanding. ~ I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
Lesson 7
Felonians 23:10 - And it came to pass that a beloved blue-haired matriarch went too far with eggnog-imbibing and met with a fatal "accident" while making her way home after a party. We are left with the question: Was it an accident? ~ Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer
Rug-Cutting 16:25 - In spite of misbehavior and empty-stocking fear, merriment is encouraged through dancing around a festooned fir tree in this time of caroling and pumpkin pie. ~ Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree
Lesson 9
Ohbygolly 12:22 - All's well that ends well, as humanity is encouraged to drink a cup of cheer (but not the laundry detergent) and greet everyone they meet for the holliest, jolliest, memory-making Christmas ever. ~ Have a Holly Jolly Christmas
